Hi bloggosphere! I’m starting my “write more” resolution early this year in the hopes that switching it up will motivate me to journal every day for 365 days running. I won’t be posting everything as I’m using as a kind of brain dump, but if I’m lucky, and work hard, that will mean 3-4 blog posts every week. For some reason my laptop is on the fritz, so my first post back this time will be absolutely picture-less, though I would hope it isn’t too bland, the dream in and of itself was one of the more graphic I’ve had in a long time:

There was a little fawn out in my yard. I didn’t want to scare it, but wanted a closer look, so I held a heavily framed mirror up to block my body and approached it. It thought I was a fawn as well and came right up to me, poking its nose at the glass, and allowing me to sneak a few little pats on its head. I played with it for a while, then headed back to my house, setting the mirror down, as it had served its purpose and the fawn trusted me enough to follow me. I had forgotten that my neighbor owned two big shepherd looking dogs, and they ran at the fence, jumping over it and running over to attack the deer.

It was over in an instant and they ran off as I got over to the side of the poor thing. It was all my fault that it had been killed, and the grief was overwhelming. I found though, that it was not yet dead, though half of its face was missing, revealing the skeletal structure of its snout and lower jaw-bone. There was a large hole in its side and as I lifted it up into a blanket, I could see that all of its intestines would slip out in a dark red bag if I didn’t hold it carefully.

I asked my boyfriend to help me get it in the car, which he did, begrudgingly, and we made our way slowly to a veterinary facility. As we drove, it slowly turned into an elderly golden retriever. I don’t know if we ever made it to the vet.

One thought on “Reflection

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